Woke up this morning feeling like soneone had kicked me in the balls with steel-capped boots. Immense pain in left nad, up stomach, around left side.

Rush to hospital, suspected twisted bollock, 10mg morphine, rushed to another hospital, emergency surgery.

Thankfully.no twisted dangler, but surgery enabled them to check, confirm, and do something to ensure they won't ever twist. Currently waiting to see what actually happened...

So yeah. Greetings from Huddersfield Hospital Bollock Ward.

I thought cassy had your balls in a box at home , srsly glad you are okay dude

Post of the Year

Just the level of sympathy I'd expect from you bastards.

S'why I love y'all.

That's so odd. Hope they find out what's gone wrong.

We're all responsible enough to take care of the forums while he's gone, right?

HOLY SHIT, ARE YOU OKA-

*ahem*

This is the last time that Blokeh tells Cass to get back in the kitchen.

Huevos estrellados

Thanks guys. Nice to know you fuckers genuinely give a shit...

They got me in something called a "scrotal support" which is basically some cheapass NHS jockstrap with bandages in it. Found this out when I went for my first after-op piss... its bizarre as shit, but I'm gonna ask to keep it, cos, y'know, pics and shit.

I'm in overnight too, but should be home early tomorrow. Thanks to a combined effort from Cassy and my old man, I now have my phone cradle, charger, earphones, Vimto, and eight episodes of Father Ted on my phone. Happy times.

Good to know they didn't find anything. Enjoy the morphine.

Oh, I see...

HERE BE SECRETS

I dunno man, if they found something it'd explain the pain. Now though... *shrugs*

Ah well, free drugs and free meals. Can't complain!

Essentially, that.

Heres hoping you get better Blokeh

Woke up at 6.45am, had blood pressure and heart rate checked. Everything looks fine, no pain, nurses seem happy, so I might be out early, fingers crossed.

What a weekend...

This is all a clever cover. Blokeh was actually masturbating with bengay or icyhot and didnt know the consequences. He cried wolf and was wizzed away to the hospital.